Easter is a ball of pastel chaos in our family.
I always end up trying on a thousand outfits to be sure we look our Sundays Best for church (and the Easter pictures to follow, let's be honest).
We always have the best intentions of listening and using the message on Easter Sunday to remind us why we're in this life and who we need to thank for it.... but I always end up just being distracted the entire time by thinking of what's for lunch and if I should have worn different shoes.
The answer is always "yes" to different shoes, by the way.
Recently though, Jesse and I had a true heart-to-heart conversation with our friend at the local furniture store after church one Sunday and I haven't stopped thinking about it.
During this conversation, we discussed so many different things about this newfound closeness we have found with Christ. While discussing our journey to parenthood, our friend David asked, "Let me ask you this: Why do you want to be a mother?"
The answer flowed off my tongue so eloquently, I probably couldn't repeat it if I tried.
But here's the gist...
"I have had the same true feeling and longing for motherhood not just because I want a tiny Jesse-Brittany hybrid to raise.... but to have an even deeper understanding of God's love for me. Parenthood is the closest I will ever get to understanding that love! Plus, I would love to raise a tiny little God-fearing and God-loving miracle!"
Tomorrow, my goal is to listen with intention during church.
To truly focus on how much I do understand God's love for me, even if Im not a mother.
He loves me enough that he sent his only child to walk this Earth, tell of His love and to perform miracles, just to end up dying for my imperfections.
God sent his son to do such incredible and amazing works, just to end up being crucified so that He could bear the weight of my sins to His Father on my behalf so that I may be forgiven.
Thats insane. I would love to say that I am Godly enough to give up my own child to this earth for the sake of mankind for the rest of time. But I definitely couldn't.
I'm being honest, here. Its an embarrassing honesty, but there it is.
Think of your child. That tiny human you created or have raised.
Could you sacrifice your child so that others could have a relationship with you?
Would you let your child take the fall for all of mankind?
Nope. Definitely not. I can promise you that you couldn't.
Thats what tomorrow is all about. Remembering that His purpose for my life and His love for me is too great to let it go to waste.
Tomorrow, I will be listening a little harder, just to be reminded of how loved I am. With our without a child, I want to understand that love as much as possible so that I can wrap myself in it and show that kind of love to others around me.
I hope you all have a Happy Easter and truly do know that you are loved beyond understanding and beyond compare.